Desiderata...

I always loved the parody....way back when....but couldn't remember its name so I couldn't find it.
Then, logic took hold...Google for 'Desiderata' then search within for 'parody'...

I can be so thick at times...

[now to chase up the CD]...

"Deteriorata" - National Lampoon

You are a fluke of the universe. You have no right to be here.
Deteriorata. Deteriorata.

Go placidly amid the noise and waste,
And remember what comfort there may be in owning a piece thereof.

Avoid quiet and passive persons, unless you are in need of sleep.
Rotate your tires.

Speak glowingly of those greater than yourself,
And heed well their advice, even though they be turkeys.
Know what to kiss, and _when_.

Consider that two wrongs never make a right, but that three do.

Wherever possible, put people on hold.

Be comforted that in the face of all aridity and disillusionment,
and despite the changing fortunes of time,
There is always a big future in computer maintenance.

Remember The Pueblo.
Strive at all times to bend, fold, spindle, and mutilate.
Know yourself. If you need help, call the FBI.

Exercise caution in your daily affairs,
Especially with those persons closest to you -
That lemon on your left, for instance.

Be assured that a walk through the ocean of most souls
Would scarcely get your feet wet.

Fall not in love therefore. It will stick to your face.
Gracefully surrender the things of youth: birds,
Clean air, tuna, Taiwan.
And let not the sands of time get in your lunch.

Hire people with hooks.
For a good time, call 606-4311. Ask for Candy.

Take heart in the deepening gloom
That your dog is finally getting enough cheese.

And reflect that whatever fortune may be your lot,
It could only be worse in Milwaukee.

You are a fluke of the universe.
You have no right to be here.
And whether you can hear it or not,
The universe is laughing behind your back.

Therefore, make peace with your god,
Whatever you perceive him to be - hairy thunderer, or cosmic muffin.

With all its hopes, dreams, promises, and urban renewal,
The world continues to deteriorate.

Give up!
2,556 views 12 replies
Reply #1 Top
Okay, now if I had said all of that, you'd be sending a padded paddy wagon out to get me.....

With that thought in mind, I do believe I'll have another beer... yes, thank you....

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Reply #2 Top
It's a worry ... we remember the original Jafo?
Cue the incense, batik printed everything, San Miguel, Dan Murphey, home grown Acapulco Gold .... and Fondue Parties!!
At least the Lava lamps and flared hipster jeans (YES!) have made a return!

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Reply #3 Top
When Jafo gets going, he writes a damned book

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Reply #4 Top
Padded paddy wagon Jam. If jarget would have said that he might have been accused of wasting bandwidth.

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Reply #6 Top
Clever parody Paul , but the real Desiderata is one of the most inspired writings ever made. Simple, but the best rule for anyones life!
I have done a wallpaper with Desiderata, if anyone is interesting, here is the link : https://www.wincustomize.com/skins.asp?library=8&SkinID=1256
Reply #7 Top
Nikos...I remember when the original got into the pop-charts...but it got pretty corny pretty quick. Fortunately along came National Lampoon with their version which was much more 'fun'...
Reply #9 Top
subequatorial phillistines?...I resemble that remark...
Reply #10 Top
or even Philistine...

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Reply #11 Top
You are welcome Bangkokboy
Don't worry, I am in control on what is going on


Yes Paul, also the word "Love" is very corny, but still has a great power
Reply #12 Top
adni,The National Lampoon song was "Deteriorata". And just for you Dr.Demento trivia fans, Melissa Manchester is the female back up singer in that song. ***now I need a beer***