Well let's see, where did I leave off? Oh yes gang central and sex and drugs. I remember now........, Good place to start. I had forgotten to state that most of the time I was a happy child and yes I was happy in my family. I am a middle child and true to form I have middle child syndrom. To a fault! I am the "black sheep" and have a temper that can call down
Again you two, Always you two. Well, My Name is Steven and I got cancer from being knocked up and bone cancer not from smokeing. There fore, yes I continue to smoke.
Dear Little Whip and Mano Peace, I ment not long after I told the cops. They hadn't picked him up yet. Sorry by that point I wasn't writing too well which is why I stopped. No he didn't live with us after the fact but yes he lived with us durring the almost two years of molestation. It was my 12th birthday that I told on him. Steven
Well, People want to know. They don't seem to understand so here it is. I am doing chapters because I can only handle so many bad memories at a time. It's too rough. I born in Utah and spent most of my time there. I have alot of family there. I remember very little about growing up. Mostly flashes of what should have been a full memory, but I have blocked out
Been wondering about that. Thank you for the up date and even coming up with this in the first place. It's fabulous!
Hurray for me. I managed to be a responcible adult and actually make a Doctor appointment. After two months of avoiding the issue I can no longer continue at work or my life without doing something about it. I hate Doctors in general. I finally gound one that I loved and she's out with a new baby. I have gone through two bouts of cancer, mental health issues, epi
Well, to put this plainly. Wendsday is gone. Now to explain. Wendsday is my bird. She was a present to me from my husband, even though she loved him the best. Humans can only think they own animals. Animals pick their owners. That's just the way of it. I was getting everything ready for work when I opened the front door to leave and remembered my bird on my shoul
Oh! Can you feel it?? The antisipantion? For sulfure, blankets, bright lights and children screaming in races through the multi colored quilt on the ground. It's that time again. For fireworks and bar-b-ques. For family coming together and parades. Yesterday my husband and I were helping a man push his broken down car through our small town where the speed limit
I have jsut read Where the heart is by Billie Letts and I loved it!!! I loved it in the special way that a book or song can touch your soul and you never truely know where that person who has never met you got your soul from. This book made me laugh out loud, cry for hours, get angry, and sigh in love. Having seen the movie before I actually wasn't expecting to l
I'm not saying that anyones life has been lessend by the thing i have been saying or that i hate everyone. I hate hardly anyone. I know what love is and think that if you love someone, anyone, you can't truely hate. That might jsut be me. I know what kind of life I have had and part of it, a big part, has been my own stupid doing. Now with health problems and oth
My husband and I got married for all the wrong reasons including him going to war. Both men know about eachother and like eachother. They hang out and have a beer and have a rather good friendship. But yes I am still married.
Doubt is crowding out my head right now. Between my Father, who's oh so wonderful, *rolls eyes*, and Mr. Dark I have been placed in the center of doubt. I think I'll start with my Father first. He decided to call me last night. After him and his wife disowned my little sister he's had no contact with me. I still just can't. I'm too angry. WEll, he called last nigh
Yay! Once more I am up for work. There's just a slight change today. It's 6 in the bloody morning! 6!!!!!!!!!!!!!! ARG!!!! People actually wake up this early. I was shocked and think it should be outlawed! There's no reason anyone should be getting up this early. Going to bed at this time is diffrent but wakeing up......., HELL NO! Being a night person I see no
It has been two days since everything has happend and all I can think of is grrrrrrrr! That's the only thing I have to say to my father. Grrrrrrrrrrrrr! He has chosen his whore over my little sister. He'll never know what a give he has lost. And amazingly enough.... the only adult so far in the situation that I can see is my little sister. She has done everythin
Thank you all for your insight. I have talked with a doctor and am seeking help and yes it is a problem. But no it's not anorexia. It has to do with more mental than physical. I am going to be seeing someone.
My weight has always been an issue for me. Not that I am fat, but that I think so. Even now when I know that I am trimming up and looking good. Half my clothing doesn't fit and yet, today I looked in the mirror and all I saw was a fat person. I know that it's my issue and lots of people tell me I am loseing too much weight. But when all you see is fat what do you do?<
I have never read your blogs before but this one sparked my interest. I grew up in much the same house hold and have a husband in the military. I am not now religous and commend you for makeing it through teenage hood and adult hood still being so. It's hard. I fully agree with you that yes, it is a right and yes it sucks that you can't go but they signed up for it. This is what you get in the military and too many people going in these days have
I am not old by any means. I am also not as young as I once was. And with that I have lived a harder life than most. And not near as hard as others. I was thinking of being younger and all the things I used to do. Like not having an embaressment button at all. Building blanket forts in the living room or dining room. Playing pretend with my friends and having adve
For everything I've been through, I love life for all it's worth. Sure, I want the smoke found in a cancer stick, Mabey a sporatic drink of alcohol. No pot in my body, thanks. I keep to my limited knowledge. I gain in ways unknown to man. And woman for that matter. I make myself known. I make myself cry. I will never lower mysel
Daddy, Dearest........, I remember. I was your favorite. But, I got lost in rebellion. You never forgave, Never forgive. That's what you taught. I learned so well. Why? Why do you scowle? I was so wanting, So loving and accepting. We had so many long talks and long walks. Now your silence kills, The roads are
The other day my best friend Kayly and I were crossing the border from Canada to the US, Which is always a pain. But we go up to see our B.F.'s so it's almost worth it. We were coming back and america has once again gotten it's panties in a wad over bomb threats. Not that anyone would ever bomb western washington if they knew anything at all. No one here would do an
I am seeing Mr. Dark still. There have some issues. In a perfect world there wouldn't be but hey realality is the world I live in, not perfect. We've been having issues lately. Nothing too big or anything, jsut issues. New relationship findings and other things. He's very protective of me and has some issues from passed relationships. And so do I. I have found tha
I spent the last three days dressing up like medevil times and getting flattered by men that in real life you'd never look twice at but for some reason..........., Everyone looks good in garb. As usual I came home tired and hurting from camping and just generally partying all weekend. But that's a good kind of feeling. It means that it's over. And you have more memor
So I have a son. He's 6. Named ZXathian. My pride and joy and much to my dismay my tired and grumpiness most of the time. I wasn't kidding in the title when i said, Rabid little ball of energy. But above all this, he's the child of my heart and my love. I have him on weekends due to stuff ya'll don't need to know. Anyway, We have a strange relationship. We are just
It's been a strange year for me and that's pretty much very cool! I like things where I don't know what's going to happen. The only problem is that as soon as something really good happens, something really bad happens too. I got a job!!!!!! Yay!!!!!!!!!!!! One of my friends tried to kill herself. I have great man!!! YAY!!!!!!!!!! He lives in another counrty tha
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