Ten Things to Never Say to a Pregnant Woman

Unless you enjoy being slapped

from JoeUser Forums
Things never to say to a pregnant woman:

1. "Hey there, big mama!"

2. "My gosh, you're enormous! Are you sure you're not having twins?"

3. "Well, looks like the boob fairy has visited you!"

4. "Should you really be eating that?"

5. "You shouldn't be feeling so cranky/tired/uncomfortable. You're not THAT pregnant yet."

6. "Are you still with the father?"

7. "Is this your last? Are you getting spayed after this?"

8. "Wow, that really is an outie!"

9. (Males only) "Yeah, the pregnancy has been hard on me, too."

10. "Pregnant women are so beautiful." (They'll never believe you.)

Better yet, just avoid speaking to pregnant women.
humor
24,084 views 15 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
I'm providing a valuable public service, 'cause there's a whole lot of tactless people out there.
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
The one that drove me crazy when my wife was pregnant was, "oh, so you wanted this one?"
Sins of a Solar Empire: Rebellion
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
I know, people look at us with four children like we're committing some kind of social sin.

My wife's favorite comment, which she's actually received from strangers: "So, are all these yours?"
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
#7 is common for us.

Big families aren't valued anymore, sadly.
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top

"So, are all these yours?"

My oldest sister  had to have a hysterectomy, so she could not have any children of her own.  So I started telling people that asked this question - "no, 2 are my sisters, and I wish she would send me the next child support payment".

Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
I was huge with my second and I got #2 on a regular basis. It definately made me cranky but I never slapped anyone. He was due in March and everyone kept asking me if he was a Christmas baby. grrr.

Also annoying "when are you due?" I guess that is pretty innocuous unless you hear it one hundred times a day. Even worse the people who think you can rub your belly. I would never start touching a strangers stomache. Stop it, you're invading my personal space. Back off, people.
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
::: Ruba Loca's belly ::: Oh, sorry, you're not even pregnant. ;~D
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top

::: Ruba Loca's belly :::

Did the Genie pop out?

Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
I've got one.

"Does this mean we have to get married?"

Worst. Proposal. Ever.
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
Or how about:

Would you like me to make difficult decisions for you? I realize what a burden it is, with "pregnancy brain"...LOL

(yer NEVER living that one down, jythier...I just hope you're hard at work on that chocolate order!)
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
Well, I was going to say something about that, something to the tune of, "I have a whole article that should never be said to a pregnant woman..." but then I realized that it should never be said to anyone, ever. The comments were pretty good, though. I remember popcorn.
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
Thought of one more: (to a non-pregnant woman) "So when are you due?"
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
Heh, don't tell a pregnant woman she can't move something or lift something.

I KNOW what I can lift or move and what I can't. Leave me alone!
Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
"So, are all these yours?"

My oldest sister had to have a hysterectomy, so she could not have any children of her own. So I started telling people that asked this question - "no, 2 are my sisters, and I wish she would send me the next child support payment".


I joked that my wife should respond with, "What are you implying?"
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top
My wife can move our entire living room around while she's pregnant. Has. Next day, she can't even move herself. Oh well.