Personally the design feature is one of the biggest reasons I like elemental. Even if it isn't important it's still there which is more than I can say for any other fantasy 4x game. Yes, it leaves a lot to be desired, the whole game does, but I think like the direction its going in. I wouldn't like the game nearly as much if I lost the option to pick and choose what roles my troops play and how they play those roles. I've never liked being restricted to what the game gave me for unit
Cathedralsquares
Surcoats. Armor looks good, but surcoats really add that sense of nationalism that I think would go a long way towards making the factions feel more distinct.
Save yourself a headache and turn autoturn off.
That's just bad AI. I advise you to raise your AI difficulty some.
It took me awhile to figure this out but if you do have the egalitarian trait in the design right above stats you'll see what look like undo arrows. Click that to change the structure of your unit. Eventually you'll get to a female set.