banned for going the wrong way

Banned for the fork in the road. 

Banned for not using spoons.

Banned for the soup course is over and dessert has not yet begun... so forget the spoons, get back to the shovel and finish your main before the chef chucks a wobbly and tops the apple pie with his own recipe for whipped cream.

Banned for my new and improved diet does not include chef chucks. 

Banned for improving your diet.

I considered losing weight recently, but I realized it was simpler to just buy new pants.

banned for taking the easy way out

Typical American Child.

Banned for being judgmental.

banned for being the anti-judge.  and why are you a sequel?

-Huzzah!

Banned for pretending to be uncle judge.

because he comes after everybody else.

banned for being the lead foxhound at the hunt

Banned for, release the hounds.            {I just like saying that} 

Banned for so you were.  Your not running away with the Mannheim band, and becoming their drummer are you?    

{I watched them, Awesome. }

Banned for side conversations with someone who's here all along but never present... oh what it is to be off with the fairies.

Banned for being Starkers.

Banned for not knowing just how starkers I really am... and it has nothing to do with being nekkid.

Banned for being a Teflon kid with a serious itch..... didn't you know Teflon is scratch resistant.

Banned because my deranged aunt is staying over for a "few" days...

AGAIN

Banned for big red font.

Banned for size doesn't matter. 

Banned for a little green font...

Banned for you didn't get that green word out of the dictionary... the emphasis being on green