Weekly Dose of Weird and Whacky Headlines

from JoeUser Forums

"Virgin Vows to Help Elephants in Kenya"--headline, Reuters, June 2

Another sacrafice for a good cause.

"Bull Run Faces Test"--headline, CNNMoney.com, June 3

It is Manassas!  No wonder they are re-testing it.  Cant even get the name right.

"Two jailed after bridge built by blind man collapses" --headline, Reuters, June 11

The builder saw nothing wrong with it.

"Health officials looking for two dangerous mosquitoes" --headline, LaCrosse Tribune, June 7

They are out for blood!

"Calif. Woman Found With 120 Pet Rats"--headline, Associated Press, June 6

Is that what they call California legislators.......

"Heavy Rains Force Shellfish Closures"--headline, Newsday (Long Island, N.Y.), June 5

Guess they clammed up.

"Scientists Move Closer to Turning Skin Cells Into Tissues"--headline, New York Times, June 6

Kleenex declares bankruptcy.

"Protesters Protest Ordinance Limiting Counter-Protests"--headline, Atlanta Journal-Constitution, June 7

Would that be a counter-counter Protest?

"Richardson Sure He Will 'Break Out' "--headline, Denver Post, June 10

New book: Acne at 50 - and how to treat it.

"China Hits Back, Rejects U.S. Nuts"--headline, Philadelphia Inquirer, June 10

Presidential candidates upset with travel ban.

"Man Chokes Attacking Bobcat" --headline, Foxnews, June 20

He should have had his wheaties.

"Rice Engineered to Carry Cholera Vaccine"--headline, Associated Press, June 11

Condoleeza Nightingale.

"Police Shoot to Kill First Woman"--headline, Daily Telegraph (London), June 12

Contract out on Eve.  Believed to be armed and dangerous.  Anonymoussss Tipsssssttter ratted her out.

humor
9,682 views 6 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
Hehe!
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
Hehe!


I'll try to get a guffaw the next time.
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Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
Very funny! but one interesting side note... about the Manassas /Bull Run issue. It all depends on where/what side you are on. Solders in the Northern Armies referred to most battles by the closest town/city. Southern solders always referred to battles by the closed creek/run/river/etc. so technically they both names are correct. btw I am full of useless facts. Other than that good work.
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
MasonMJune 21, 2007 20:22:37


Glad you got a laugh!
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
about the Manassas /Bull Run issue. It all depends on where/what side you are on. Solders in the Northern Armies referred to most battles by the closest town/city. Southern solders always referred to battles by the closed creek/run/river/etc. so technically they both names are correct.


Being from Virginia, I can hardly escape it. However, I think you have these reversed. The north called it Bull Run, and the south Manassas.