Diplomacy Issues

Hey guys I've got some issues/questions/bugs with regards to diplomacy and displayed information.

I've been trying (and failing) to win a diplomatic victory with the Iridians.  I found it generally impossible, and have absolutely no idea why.

It seems that certain diplomatic modifiers carry much more weight with certain factions than others, and whats more, it doesn't seem consistent in game to game.

The biggest issue is opposing ideology diplomatic influences.  I was traiting in Pragmatic, and noticed that some factions hate me for my ideology, whether they are malevolent or benevolent, whereas others (also benevolent or malevolent) didn't have an issue with it at all.  Furthermore, trading/allying with an enemy/infidel seemed to be much more of an issue to some factions than others.  In a previous game, where I was playing as malevolent, I had no issues from some benevolent factions, but major problems from some pragmatic ones.  TRading with an empire (and with all the diplomatic bonuses from the Pragmatic line) resulted in a massive boost in diplomacy (from the Yor, of all [people]) but would not even budge the slider from others.  Finally, the "diplomatic skill boost" resulted in a large boost from certain factions (3 plusses) but only small boost in others (1+).  I also did not find that building embassies/diplomacy buildings on every single planet I owned resulted in any visible change in the diplomacy screen - every faction who didn't love me already just hated me more, despite the small army of diplomats I owned.  Finally finally, I guess there is no diplomatic benefit in sending a gift to another faction?

Is there any way we can change the "plus" notation to actual numbers?  I'm guessing the plusses are just relative - that 3 plusses will give the same value as 1 plus if the overall current diplomacy ranking is very high or very low.  Either way, more information here would be greatly appreciated. In the end I could only form alliances with other pragmatists, and (for what ever reason), the very evil Yor.

Lastly, the AI decisions in UP votes are ridiculous and needs a lot of attention.  In my last game, many factions (including my allies) voted for beneficial effects for the Drengin (such as hosting the UP headquarters on their worlds) despite the fact that every faction in the game was at war with them.

Any additional info will be greatly appreciated!  I know diplomacy is on the devs list for future development, but any current information with regards to the workings of this system will help.  If these things are bugs, I will gladly upload a few saves.