Well you're double banned all of that and in triplicate.... with an option to renew the lease on it for another 12 months.

banned for all the red tape

Banned for holding it all together with duct tape and a bit of spit.

banned for sending the snow so far south

Banned for betting on the white stuff.

Banned fer white stuff in yer belfry..... I was led to believe it's supposed tp be grey.

Banned for thinking it (grey) 'matters'.  

Banned for one too many shades of grey.

Banned for contusions.

banned for being so blue with a hint of black

Banned for the king of the blues was black and one of my favourite musicians of all time.

Banned for colors that contrast with everything else.

Banned for trying to order hospital food at home.

banned for trying to be so hospitable 

Banned for hospitality under a full overcast sunset.

Banned for confusing east and west and sunrise and sunset.

Also, banned for thinking people fall up at night.

Banned for falling up the down escalator.

banned for escalating the issues

Banned for issuing an escalating ban.

Banned for escalating issues pertaining to the issues of escalated banning to the enth degree.

Banned for starting a new page.

banned for paging people

Banned for sticking your foot out to trip people answering their pagers.

Banned for ancient technicalities.

Banned for blaming us with big feet for the clumsy tripping of technically ancient pagers.