Signposts

It is a great distance for a single man to cover
Between being alone in the world to taking a lover
The intimacy required is never easily expressed
Those words she longs to hear have long been suppressed

He walks in circles tongue tied and lost
The emotions he feels he knows come at a cost
He only wants it to be simple, straightforward and easy
Like in his dreams, where she is both pure and porn sleazy

He is rudderless in an ocean of open displays of affection
Of smells and of tastes and of jealous over-protection
The impact it has changes every aspect of his life
Until he grows to understand she’s his friend as well as his wife

It is expectations he has never before had to control
He never understood his part until he became part of the a whole
3,306 views 19 replies
Reply #1 Top

What's that word? Gestalt?

And I hate to regurgitate the cliche of Jerry McGuire's "she completes me" but...yeah she does.

Excellent as always, Maso...   
Reply #2 Top
In marriage it seems we become both something less and something more.
We marry who we will become as much as our spouse.
For me, your poem voiced that angst beautifully.
Reply #3 Top
Bravo! That was so insightful and fun to read. Thanks!
Reply #4 Top
Shovel,

she completes me


Exactly where I was coming from, but long-winded, as usual Thanks for the continued encouragement, mate.

Don,

we become both something less and something more


It is all about sacrifice in the name of love. We, both men and women, give up a lot to become something more. I think once we can acknowledge this, the relationship we form because so much sturdier. Thanks for the comments and support, again mate. BTW I got your email - thanks. Will get something to you as soon as I can.

Buddah,

Thanks mate. I continue to be encouraged and inspired by reading your work.
Reply #5 Top
It is all about sacrafice in the name of love. We, both men and women, give up a lot to become something more. I think once we can acknowledge this, the relationship we form because so much sturdier.

It took me awhile to learn how to sacrifice, and I'm so happy I did. The rewards are so much better.

Great as always, mate.
Reply #6 Top
Chris,

It takes us all a while, mate, particuarly us men (but I don't want others to hear else I might lose my membership to the Bald Apes Club )

Thanks for your comments, mate.
Reply #7 Top
Dig

It took me awhile to learn how to sacrifice, and I'm so happy I did.





I thought this was lovely, Mark.
Reply #8 Top
Rose,

Thanks very much. You all (as in women) deserve to know while we might find it hard sometimes to say what we think, we do think good things about you all.
Reply #9 Top
Awwwww you guys are so sweet! Mark, this is so beautiful, you sure know how to make a girl melt inside! Lucky Toni!
Reply #10 Top
It is all about sacrifice in the name of love. We, both men and women, give up a lot to become something more.


dynamaso,

I have never really quite understood what people mean by that, or maybe I do and I just don't agree. I'm not really sure. Do you mind having discussions about the concepts in your poetry or do you prefer to keep discussion more focused on the work?
Reply #11 Top
Serenity,

Thanks heaps, mate. It is absolutely inspired by past failures and present success. You might think Toni is the lucky one, but it is me who feels truly lucky.

Abe,

I don't mind having discussions at all. I believe a good piece of writing should inspire discussion and debate (not that I'm saying I'm good , mind ) I'd be interested in knowing how you understood the concepts of this piece.
Reply #12 Top
dynamaso,

I don't understand/agree with the idea of sacrificing for love. To me, if it's love there is no sacrifice. If there is sacrifice then it is not love, but an expression of insecurity. I guess what I'm asking is: what is given up when we enter a loving relationship?

BTW, I think you poem is a lot more powerful when the sentences are read from last to first.
Reply #13 Top
if it's love there is no sacrifice

Interesting point of view, Abe. I hope you don't mind if I give you mine.

For me, love is not just a feeling. Ideal love is a series of acts, some of which will be detrimental to me, but all of which will be beneficial to the one I love. Therefore, I see sacrifice as a positive proof of love. Without it, I am really only loving myself. I am only being selfish.

Intellectually, though, I am tantalized by your point of view. I see that for you, sacrifice cannot coexist with love. What, then, is your definition of love?
Reply #14 Top
For me, love is not just a feeling. Ideal love is a series of acts, some of which will be detrimental to me, but all of which will be beneficial to the one I love. Therefore, I see sacrifice as a positive proof of love. Without it, I am really only loving myself. I am only being selfish.


Exccellent reply, Doc (I'm a little envious as I'm pathetic in the 'reply' department) I agree but I do see where Cubbage is coming from. His reply reminds me of an Anthony Demello (Google him!) quote about a man who was asked if he would sacrifice his happiness for love and he said yes. Then the same question was asked to his lover and she said yes, she would sacrifice her happiness for love too. "So," Mello said, "here we have two unhappy people, but long live love!"
Reply #15 Top
Good example, Shovel.

But then you could argue that if each "truly" loved the other person and were able to see the other person's needs, they would sacrifice that relationship. Yes, if that's what he means, I think I see Abe's point. Sacrifice in the name of love is not enough for a relationship to work.

I do see some pretty miserable situations motivated by love, though. The love that parents have for a chronically sick or terminally sick children, for example.  These relationships are self-sacrificing and as true to my ideal of love as you can get.
Reply #16 Top
The love of a parent for a sick child for one. These relationships are as loving you get.


So true, so true. But this king of giving isn't seen by the giver as a sacrifice at all. Never let your left hand know what your right is doing and all that. Good points all!   
Reply #17 Top
Good points all!

   agreed! It's nice to get the last word in, isn't it?  
Reply #18 Top
But this king of giving


oops! Typo there! Shoulda read kind

(and...last word! haha!   )
Reply #19 Top
Abe,

what is given up when we enter a loving relationship?


Interesting question. I think we all sacrafice something of our singledom to enter a relationship. I don't see the sacrafice as a sign of insecurity but more as an offering, an appeasement, if you will. In this way we allow ourselves to grow and move forward in partnership.

As to the question of what we sacrafice, I think this is very individual. I know what I gave up but I'm sure Don or Shovel or anyone else reading this would probably have their own ideas.

I think you poem is a lot more powerful when the sentences are read from last to first


Wow, it does change the perspective, doesn't it?

Don/Shovel,

Thanks to you both for keeping this alive. Easter has kept me busy and away from here. You both make some particularly salient points. Thanks...

The love that parents have for a chronically sick or terminally sick children, for example


Excellent point, Don. How huge is the sacrafice people in these situations make?