Population is small beans compared to tradecenters because you can make such quick gains
While loyalty and your trade port length are wild cards here, population upgrades are usually more lucrative than building trade ports. It takes a while for population to build up, but typically one population upgrade raises tax income more than one trade port will generate, but at a lower cost. It's a good idea to max them out on all your inner worlds, and only start neglecting them as loyalty plummets. Furthermore, as I've mentioned elsewhere, capturing more planets and building additional extractors is a way better deal than building trade ports.
I guess its just because the advent are so damn good on defense against enemy fleets and the other players weren't as experienced as players like Raging Amish
Advent has a viciously powerful fleet. Talk to any player and they will agree that this is the fleet to fear.
usually I just turn down the ship and build speeds so players can't be quite so cheap
Slower game speeds actually makes "spam" better, since it takes much longer to react and counter an enemy. More than anything slow game speeds throw off people's sense of timing.
Honestly, though, if you blow all your cash on economy and a huge fleet comes knocking on your door, you can't call it "cheap". Anticipate your enemy's capabilities and ensure you're ready for them. It'd be remarkably boring if the game was just a rush to see who could build the biggest econ because rushing didn't work at all.
send the pirates after their asses a few times at the start of the game too... pirates are weak as shit though
Pirates, IMO, aren't worth paying for. You're losing money on bounty and your enemy is getting experience off them. They aren't even strong enough to present a real threat. Unless the pirate base is a thorn in the side of the enemy's empire, the location they attack is usually so predictable they can just station a capital ship there to milk the raids for experience.