Stardock, since it seems that you are reading this thread.
To give a quick background, I worked for Sony as QA I, QA II for Playstation II, PSP release games and PS III release games for about three years. I may not be a gaming expert but I understand how the industry works from the QA / development perspective.
I believe you should continue the development of your product. One of the reasons why a lot of people come on the forum to complain is because they actually like the game. If they did not, they would just unistall it and go their merry way.
This game has amazing potential, the RTS and RPG elements are an awesome combination. This game was reccomended to me by a friend. I in turn reccomended it to two more friends. But guess what I told my friends? I said "this game is awesome, its where Diablo meets Warcraft but if you go online be patient with it".
I understand that network coding is an ugly beast mainly because its a lot harder to test and even harder to verify if problems get fixed or not, packets can be dropped from servers, routers, cable modems, bad wireless connections etc. Having said that I hosted a game two days ago for a 2v2 and I was the one that got dropped. I have also been in a 2v1 Pantheon game twice. Could it be that I had a lag spike? Maybe in the 2v1 game one of the players left before the load? For sure.
However if everyone is experiencing it, either the internet is unreliable for every single player that plays this game or there is an issue with the game's networking code. I am sure your team stress tested the servers, perhaps more tests must be done when it comes to game creation and team matching.
Will adding more demigods, clans, replays be good? Of course, it will keep your current players still interested and perhaps old players to rejoin. Will it be an uphill battle? Probably.
In the current state of the gaming industry there is a huge push to develop games and push them out the door and bugs can always be fixed later. This is not just the PC gaming industry, but the gaming industry as a whole, I have experienced this both as a QA and a player. I also understand the complexities of deadlines, available funds, hard deadlines for final version for factory production etc.
Having said that I rather wait for a game two extra months and have it play flawlessly, than buy it on time and have to deal with issues. I understand that no matter what a game will have flaws, with the increasing complexity of games, the large playerbase things are bound to break.
Perhaps I am being unfair since I am seeing this from the eyes of an ex-QA and not from the product development side. In the end what has happened has happened. Now you can focus on the present and the future. Realize that the forums are not an accurate snapshot of the community as a whole. If you want to see examples of that just head to the World of Warcraft forums...according to the forums the game is the most horrible game in the planet, yet they have 11 million people playing it.
Obviously I am unaware of the internal politics of the company, how much budget you have available etc, but for what its worth as an experienced gamer and a person that used to work in the industry I definitely see potential in this game. Never underestimate how powerful word of mouth actually is in the gaming circles.