Bet you feel small,
It happens to us all.

Time is now
To spread your voice
Time's to come,
there'll be no choice,

Why d'you feel small?
It happens to us all.

~ Graeme Edge of the Moody Blues

I'm not surprised, Gandalf still owns the copyright for that hat

and who owns google then?

The problem with an online persona is that you don't get the body language, voice inflections, ect. of people.  Just cold, unemotional words.

I always assume the best of people, just to keep my own faith in the human race not being a bunch of idiots...

awesome post

I'm the same way, always try to see the best in people.  In the last year though, I've learned something about that.  This is a little story about how weird life can be...

At least for me, it was my Internet Community experiences that made me want to pursue this saintly path of believing people are good.  Too many meaningless arguments with people you don't know makes you realize how meaningless arguments are.  Upon returning to the real-world, (Read: Life, Land of the Living,) I found out something rather interesting, all caused by an encounter with a...  Let's call him an old nemesis.

We never got along in High School, he'd pick on me and what-not.  I was never the confrontational type, so I just ignored it.  But I ran into him again somewhat recently.  He was still a jerk.  I was no longer non-confrontational.  Rather, I had become non...  Well, I didn't wanna just ignore him, but I didn't wanna lash out at him either.  So I walked up to him, said hi, started talking to him like we were old friends.  That's when his girlfriend, (I assume it was his girlfriend, for reasons explained later on,) walked up and heard him make a rather snide remark about me.  At this point I reverted to my good ol' non-confrontational self, as she was getting angry with him, and I left.

Now, they didn't break up.  Quite the contrary, they worked out the problem with him being a jerk towards me, and got married.  He later invited me to be in his wedding party.  I declined as I only do Best Man gigs, (Pfft, yeah right, that was a joke btw =P) but he friend'd me on Facebook and asked if we could meet.  I was rather shocked at both of these things.  I accepted the meeting, knowing that, since I didn't somehow accidentally destroy his relationship, my ass was safe and sound and kick-immune.

He chose to meet me on the spot where he had last made fun of me...  Which was even more re-assuring, since it was an exceptionally public place, and unless his goal was to also humiliate me, there was no way he would risk beating me down for jail-time.  I figured I would do the same thing I did last time, just to be sure I wasn't going to get beaten...  So I walked up and said hi in the nicest voice I could without sounding girly.  Without saying hi back, he began apologizing for his behavior before and in High School...  Now instead of smiling and trying to look completely harmless, I just looked like someone had told me I'd won the lottery, or something similar.  Dumb-founded.

He said something along the lines of, "The fight you saw me having with my fiancee, well, it was a real wake-up call.  You were being perfectly polite and kind and I was being an ass.  The only time it's okay to be an ass is when it stands on principle, and when you're sure you won't back down on the subject, and it's important to you."  (What he said was so much more elegantly put...  I wish I could remember it verbatim...)  Apparently the fight I'd accidentally incited caused him and his future wife to have a heart-to-heart about life and what it meant to be an adult.  He thanked me for nearly blowing up his relationship, and repeated the offer to be in his wedding party.  (In case it wasn't clear, the line above about declining because it wasn't a best-man thing was a total joke.  This is where I actually decline the offer.)  He said he understood, thanked me again, and went on his way.  I haven't heard from him since, though I did receive the official letter inviting me to the wedding.  He's been married for several months now, and I, through passivity and genuine, if strained kindness, dealt with my former nemesis...

Just an example of how being blindly optimistic, believing the best about people, and acting upon it can actually change something every once in a while.

As far as online personas go...  In case anyone can't tell...  I like to type.  =P

great post

I smiled at the last line.

LoL! Don't think they were the only ones to think that Jafo.

Jafo? That's not a Blue Thunder reference is it?

You're definetly right on this one Brad!   And as long as the media has so much power, they can shape our image at will!

[quote who="RikazeMA" reply="36" id="2810469"]

I found out something rather interesting, all caused by an encounter with a...  Let's call him an old nemesis.
We never got along in High School, he'd pick on me and what-not.  I was never the confrontational type, so I just ignored it.  /quote]

This brings back memories....I'm also the non-confrontational type. Boy was that a mistake....you must stand up for yourself to have any honor.

Through life, I regret being so wimpy. Should have shown strength!

But they say it's never to late to start....

Just remember: If you don't stand up for yourself, someone will put you down!

There's been done several studies on internet communication, and the consensus seems to be that of all our forms of communication it is less considerate, more objective, and a bit harsher, than any other. If you want to give a critique of someone's work, do it on email. It's actually the best vehicle for it, both to send and receive. Arguments, however, it's not. People will tend to give, and take, offence much easier. Humor is much more difficult.

As such I am very careful on the internet. I do try to keep the above in mind; I find no value in causing offence, nor do I feel the need to educate complete strangers who may just be joking or exaggerating.

As a case in point, when I was younger I had a long, and exasperating, debate with some guy. After a few weeks of it, I gave him my phone number and said we'd discuss it on the phone instead. Our disagreement was solved in a minute; there was no real disagreement, it was just the way we worded things. Since then we were rather good friends.

Also, as a case in point, that is why it is easier - and far more wrong - to fire someone through Email.

This ties in nicely with what Frogboy said - your online persona will not be judged lightly, but it will be judged. Emails and forums are not the place for making friends; the main reason why it does at all is that forums are usually a place to meet for people with the same interests. I don't need to point out that when the interest is a game, without necessarily being an interest in the same direction (one guy being annoyed at bugs and poking around the forums for some help and grievance venting, while the other guy thinks the game is the best thing ever and want to share that) then you can find arguments very easily.

World of Warcraft, when you stop playing they remove all your work from the Armory.com.  You did NOTHING for a year.  Gone.